[tinkerbell]

Dixie has been having problems with her computer so I have no one right now to whine to .. Today we found out DH's avonex injections will not be coming .. he has one injection left. It seems our insurance company which we pay $600.0 a month in premuims (out of pocket) has desided we must only get his injections through them (express-scripts) and the cost to us out of pocket would increase from $50 a month to $100. a month. DH threw a fit and said that was it .. he wasnt going to pay more. I am afraid ..the avonex isnt not a sure thing for preventing the MS from progressing but it was hope. I am afraid .. while nothing may happen at all even with out the avonex ..it was something we had hope in. I know,, I know there are people worse off in this world .. Like I aways tell my self when my foot hurts really bad .. "I complainted about my feet hurting till I met a man with no legs" but I am afraid and feeling helpless and loss. our premuims went up to $600.oo this year .. thats out of our pocket, not to mention the co-pay increased too. Melvin was so mad and I think too he is a little afriad of what might lay ahead for him with out those injections . true he hates them but they were hope. Of course DH also said "well I am glad you got those AP's because maybe now we need to go to WDW as much as possible"
he has gone off to bed and now I have let my self cry .. sometimes i hate having to be strong and be the one that has all the responsiblity .. I know .. I am just having a big pity party and maybe tomorrow I will be able to deal with all this better. But right now I feel so lost and afraid and tired of having control of our lives.
no one needs to reply to this ... I just needed to put in to words how hopeless helpless and tired I am feeling right now. With out contact with Dixie ..those of you at DC .. who have been so sweet and compassionate in the past were the only ones I felt I could turn to

[dznygrl]

Aw, Tink! I am so sorry!! :cry:

I can't imagine how frustrating that must be. I really hope you can find a way through the mess with your insurance, because that is incredibly unfair. I will be praying for you and thinking of you!

:heart :heart :heart

Here's some extra pixie dust...

[JM0318]

Oh Tinkerbell, I truely can relate... MY DH spent 9 months in the hosptial. There were days I did not think I could go on another minute. In fact one day I just went to bed and cried and cried... at the time I was going to work going to the hospital and then getting home about 9 or 10 at night and then doing it all over again 7 days a week.. My DH was in intesive care most of the time he was in the hospital... They accutally wrote him off 3 different times. and one of the times was on my DD's Birthday and she passed away at 11 years old on Mother's Day of 1994. Beleive me I was on my knees that day... Begging the Dear Lord not to take him, please not that Day. But he made it through and He is home now and doing well... Walks with a limp and has to have a mobility scooter when we go to the parks... But I just wanted you to know that you can vent anytime with me... Please feel free to PM me at anytime and also if you would like I will send my Phone number if you need to talk instead of type... I think I could write a book about what we have been through with insurance companies and the cost of Meds... When my DD passed away... I got a phone call from our insurance saying that they were not going to pay because we did not call and get permission to put her in the hospital... Finally I got really upset and told the young man that our DD died, now what kind of permission did I not get. He then told me that he would approve the payment... So sometimes you have to just get mad enough to make them do the right thing.... And again Please feel free to contact me anytime....
:heart :) :heart Judy

[tiggerlover1971]

I am so sorry to hear that tink I also think insurances are out to make money instead of being there to help you I know our deductibles to go to doctors and to pay for meds has gone up and its horrible I also think its a shame they didnt let you know that you need to order meds through the mail

[preidel24]

Tink<

Although I can never imagine the anguish you and Melvin go through daily I do know that you are a very strong and compassionate woman. Melvin is a very lucky man to have you and I'm sure you feel lucky to have him too. You need to take time for yourself and just remove yourself from the situation if even for a few hours (I know that easy said than done). Put it aside for a few hours so that you can regroup and refresh and then tackle the issues again when you've rested at bit (kinda like Melvin did). Does your state have a catastrophic insurance fund where you can apply for meds and doctors visits above and beyond what would be deemed a financial necessity (we have that here in NJ). Also contact the maker of your medication I used to do medical trails for drug company and many give drugs away or offer them at reduced rates. I will keep you and Melvin in my prayers and I wish you some peace and solitude. Also sending you a big old truck load of pixie dust!!!!

Please feel free to PM me anytime - I'm a stay at home Mom so I'm always around!!! Take care.

Paula

[MickeyMamma]

Sorry to hear that things are so rough for you, Tink. Insurance companies make you feel bad for needing treatment for something and I hate it!! I can sympathize with what you are going through. I hope things work out.

[tinkerbell]

I am really sorry I posted this .. I was at such a low point last night. there was ( and still is none) no reasoning with my DH about the injections. He just went off and refuses to pay the additional $50.00. He has a point ..we already pay for the insurance so that we dont have to pay as much for meds. and the fact that it will cost an additional $50 a month to go through express scripts compared to getting his injections through Direct Delivery is insane. Dana hon its not Melvin's fault he cant take on any of the burden or decisions .. the MS effects his cognitve abilities, so its very hard ..sometimes impossible for him to concentrate or understand things.

again sorry, I just sorta lost my mind for a bit last night, as I said Dixie has had computer / connection problems ..lol and it wasnt a good time to call england or I would have been on the phone to her . I just got an email from her saying she is fixed ..so she is about to get a huge email .. like ya'll she will validate all my fustrations and scream and rant just as loud and long :) JM0318 you truely make me ashamed of my pity party .. you are so strong !!

[ajbdk5]

Tink, sending prayers and lots of pixie-dust!

I know it's hard to always stay strong, just hang in there, try to press on through, and take each day as it comes. :heart

[LRTJS]

Lisa you know that I think of you as one of my dearest friends, and I don't mean just an internet friend. I am glad you reached out to the DC family. The more prayers the better. There is no way I can no what it is like to face a debilitating disease day after day. I would hop on a plane an go to Texas for you if you needed it. I hope you are feeling some better now. I also hope that Melvin will go ahead and spend the extra money for the shots. I believe it is unjust but also that it is something he needs. My son's surgery is going to cost us thousands but it is nothing compared to Melvin's future.

[monorailgoof]

I know things will get better!
In the meantime, everyone here at DC cares about you!
You always have a friend at the best place on the web!
Hope and Prayers.........:D
-MoNoRaIlGoOf!
:)

[iluvwdw]

Tink, you are in my thoughts and prayers. You are so strong all the time, and it is OK if you cry every so often, to let it out. All of your friends here on DC really care about you. I hope it all works out...like Priedel said, maybe there is someone you can contact locally to help cover some of the out of pocket expenses you have had to endure?!?

I am sending you PIXIE dust right now.....

[tinkerbell]

Originally posted by monorailgoof
I know things will get better!
In the meantime, everyone here at DC cares about you!
You always have a friend at the best place on the web!
Hope and Prayers.........:D
-MoNoRaIlGoOf!
:)

thank you .. your right I do have friends here.. I am very embarrased about this thread. I repeat I was out of my mind last night when I posted it. It was fear and fustration and being all alone at the time. but I wasnt really alone because ya'll were here.

ok a bit of humor .. weird humor but humor.. in a few months DH will be able to get medicare because after 2 years of SSD he is entitled to medicare ..of course it wont cover me and guess what ..it also does not cover the injections. ..ohh I forgot I was going for humor .. here it is .. our insurance premuims are double our house payments .. our home will be paid off in only 12 more years, but we will always have to pay more and more on health insurance of some kind .. mmm on second thought there is nothing funny here
:dazed :dazed

[Jacki]

Tink, my prayers are with you and your hubby, please do not be ashamed of this post!! That is what makes this site so GREAT, the caring, compassionate people, who consider you a big part of this FAMILY!!! You guys are great whether it is good news or bad, people here are soooooooo supportive!!!

I hope things get better for you guys, I always wonder why bad things happen to good people? did you ever think about appealing this? I am not sure how to go about it but it would be worth looking into!!!

TTFN, Jacki:)

[Willbegone]

Originally posted by tinkerbell
I am very embarrased about this thread.

TINK,
Do not be embarrased by this thread! We are family here and family wants to be there to lend an ear when you are at your lowest point. I think it is touching that you thought enough of all of us here to share such feelings with us. It is much better to vent then keep it in! Believe me I know, about 1 1/2 years ago I started suffering from panic attacks because I was holding all my stress and anxiety in and not relieving it. So anytime you need to vent DO IT without hesitation we are here to lend a listening ear.

Continuing to pray for you,
Melinda

[mickaholic4077]

Oh,Tink,I so hope that all your troubles will lessen as soon as possible!!! I'm sending you the biggest load of Pixie Dust that I can.