[EmpressJenny]

Cast: Me, Pete, and my old world, Greek 65 year old MIL (who is overweight and broke her foot 5 years ago)

We take MIL to MK yesterday, arriving at 3PM. Nearly an unmitigated disaster. Let's not even talk about the crowds. Ok, let's. At LEAST an 8. What a nightmare. I haven't seen it so crowded since spring break. It was ugly.

First, we argue w/the parking guy to park close to the tram, and not at the very end of the line, because my MIL can't walk that far. He finally grumpily lets us park where we need to. Boy, that was big of him. Then she starts complaining "why you bring me here?" Um, because you wanted to go? Do you want to go home?!?!?!? Exercise in patience.

We finally get her up to the monorail, the kind man allows us to not go to the end of the line so she won't have to walk. I run ahead once we get to MK to get her a wheelchair - thankfully, they still have a double-wide available. Then she complains about not wanting the chair. There is NO WAY I'm carrying her through MK all day so we make her sit and off we go. Unfortunately, we arrive right in the middle of the Share a Dream Come True parade. We maneuver her close as possible in Liberty Square, and she sees Mickey, which seems to cheer her up somewhat.

Then we get into the handicapped line for Haunted Mansion. Standby was 30 minutes. We waited at least 40. Then a woman to our right parked the stroller, and tossed the baby blanket to her husband, who was on our left, in the standby line. I looked at her and said, "Hey, if you don't want to toss the baby, I don't mind passing her." They both laughed at me, but then the mother realized she wasn't going to make it over the chain with the baby in hand, so she did pass her to me. I only held that 3 month old girl for about 5 seconds while I gave her to her daddy, but there was something about holding that round, warm, pink-wearing, pebbles-flintstone-haired baby that made me all mushy inside

Anyhow, back to HM. I don't know what was going on, but the wait was ridiculous, and then they made a big deal about stopping the conveyer belt so MIL could get on. Excuse me, but I know that I've sat in HM for at least 10 minutes many a time while they aid other guests. I let Pete ride w/MIL and I got my own buggy. So peaceful!

A word of advice to anyone who is planning on traveling with a wheelchair guest. Never walk in front of them. At least not while Pete is driving. He ran over the back of my Achilles Tendon with the metal foot pedal of the wheelchair, and I swear I would have fallen to the ground screaming if there hadn't been a crowd. As it was, I tucked myself onto one of the steps in Liberty Square and put my head down so no one would see my face. Unfortunately that attracted the attention of a CM which attracted the attention of several other guests. Very embarrassing, but my heel was purple. I sent Pete and MIL to Columbia Harbor House for food before I completely lost my mind.

We spent the rest of the day jumping right on rides like Peter Pan, Snow White, and Jungle Cruise (which she loved the most). Philharmagic, Pirates, and Small World (to a lesser extent) all had regular standby lines, but she really enjoyed all of them. We tried to get her on Splash Mountain, but no such luck. We hauled her onto the TTC, and she liked that too, and the CM was very kind in assisting her on the ride, especially because he was a maintenance janitorial CM and not a ride operator, I thought that was above and beyond his job description.

*HELPING RITUAL ALERT* Let me just say, before I forget, that the Jungle Cruise group we got was very nice. We had several handicapped guests in our boat, and all of the male family members from each family assisted everyone else's handicapped member. It was very heartwarming to see so many people helping each other, strangers, especially with ill, overweight, and injured guests. There was one poor man who must have been close to 500 lbs and it took three or four guys to help him out of the boat. Pete braced himself, one hand on each bar behind the man in case he slipped, he would fall onto Pete's chest and not down onto the deck. He told me later that he was terrified that the man would fall and that Pete wouldn't be strong enough to keep him from hurting himself. Thankfully there were several CMs helping on the other end, so it didn't come to that.

Finally it was time for Spectromagic, and after getting run over by at least 5 strollers, (some of whom apologized and some of whom couldn't be bothered to apologize) we found a spot just large enough to fit MIL's wheelchair right near Casey's. 20 min before showtime too! Some cranky middle-aged women LAYING on the ground next to us said to us "do you know this is a walkway?" I said, "No, I didn't." And kept us right there. We were behind the tape where we needed to be, there was enough room for people to pass us on the right, if they sat up instead of laying down. 5 minutes before showtime a group of people came and stood right in between us and the old birds and there was much squawking about how they had been there for 2 hours and were getting pushed out. Hmmm....did they really think they were going to be able to lay all over the pavement? Pete and I stifled giggles.

MIL liked the parade, 30 minutes left until Wishes , so we wheeled her down to the big tree at the base of Main St., saw the show, and headed back to the car, avoiding a MASSIVE protein spill on the way.

So in closing let me say this. She really enjoyed herself, despite all the complaining, so in that sense, it was worth it. But as Pete and I lay in bed last night I looked at him and said, "Never again."

[Andrea]

Is this your second time in a row for taking along a "difficult" companion? You're a Disney Martyr! Thanks for the report.

[EmpressJenny]

Actually, Andrea, it is and I didn't even realize it! Wow, Pete and I really need to re-assess who's going to WDW with us and who isn't from now on!

[Erin]

hahaha!! That was a great TR, Jenny. You have such a sense of humor for odd stuff :c)

I'm glad she had the experience, but I wouldn't be able to do that again, either! LOL!

:c)

Maybe next time you should take a DCer!

[Dana]

I'm glad you got to take her, but wouldn't want to take her a seond time either. Sounds like a tough day. At least you guys got on some attractions despite the crowds. Thanks for sharing another trip.

[alicefan]

Well , at least you got a few laughs! And so did I reading your TR!

[richaimg]

Great report (from this end - LOL). So would your MIL want to go back again? Or was once enough for her too?

[Kippage]

LOL, EJ - too funny!

Btw, I can't believe no one has commented on the EJ + baby section!

[missy H]

I love your TR Jenny, your MIL sounds just like mine, never happy unless she is moaning about something!

I think it's time you and pete had a happy trip to the world all by yourselves!

[Prezcatz]

You're so sweet to take your MIL, experience all those negatives, and still come out with a happy ending. I gasped and laughed all in one TR. Unbelievable--only at Disney!!! EJ, you can be my MK guide anyday--I promise to be less trouble!
Prezcatz Paul

[dhoughton]

Great TR--you do deserve a trophy of some sort! You made me laugh and that is a good thing on Monday morning!

[Boss Mouse]

Originally Posted by Kippage

LOL, EJ - too funny!

Btw, I can't believe no one has commented on the EJ + baby section!

I'm with Kip on this. You sounded pretty comfy with the little bundle Ej. Considering a personalized version?

[EmpressJenny]

Thanks for the compliments, guys! Things have been so crazy lately, I've really missed DC and want to spend more time here again. As for the baby stuff... I've started prenatal vitamins, but we're holding off for a little while yet. Just want to be prepared should things change.

Anyhow, Pete and I are going without MIL next Sunday. We are hoping to see Lawwin & Co during that time!